


Not Exactly Subtle

by kathrynactually



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/M, Gossip Girl AU, M/M, They're All Gay, don't watch gossip girl if you haven't already, it'll probably become more original as the story goes on, louis and liam are dating in the beginning, louis's really dramatic, so obviously it's a little different from the show, spoiler - Freeform, this is mainly a louis and harry story, this will follow gossip girl a lot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-12
Updated: 2015-11-16
Packaged: 2018-05-01 06:42:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,606
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5196035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathrynactually/pseuds/kathrynactually
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gossip Girl AU featuring Zayn Malik as the "It Guy", Liam Payne as the "Golden Boy", Niall Horan as "Lonely Boy", with Harry Styles as the "City Slut", and Louis Tomlinson as the "Queen Bee".</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. "It Guy"

_Hey Upper East Siders, Gossip Girl here, and I have the biggest news ever. One of my many sources, caroline91, sends us this: spotted at King’s Cross, bags in hand: Zayn Malik. Was it only a year ago our It Guy mysteriously disappeared for quote, “boarding school” and just as mysteriously he’s back? Don’t believe me? See for yourselves. Lucky for us, caroline91 sent proof. Thanks for the photo, Care._

Louis looks down at his phone in disbelief. Zayn’s back in London and hasn’t bothered to contact him. They’ve been best friends since primary school, but nobody would be able to tell if the last year was anything to go by. 

Louis’s mum is throwing a party in honor of some fashion thing – there are always so many parties, Louis is constantly forgetting what the reasons for them are. He leaves his room to go find his boyfriend, Liam, and see if he’s found out about Zayn yet. He sees Liam talking with his own father and some business men. 

Without paying much mind to whatever it is they’re talking about, Louis walks up and directs his question to Liam’s father, “Excuse me Captain, mind if I borrow Liam for a moment?” He flashes one of his best smiles and barely hears the Captain say okay to Louis before he’s dragging Liam away. 

Louis is guiding Liam towards the stairs when they’re interrupted from a few yards away, “Liam!”

They both turn to see Harry, Liam’s best friend, sitting on a couch, surrounded by girls and guys craving for his affection. Harry continues talking to Liam, ignoring his company, “Any interest in some fresh air?” Harry makes a gesture which makes it obvious that by “fresh air,” he’s really asking if he wants to go smoke. 

Liam looks at Louis and then turns back to Harry to reply, “Maybe when I get back?”

Louis and Liam turn to leave and Louis shouts, “If he gets back!” as they’re walking up the stairs. 

They run up the stairs and Louis pushes Liam into his room. 

“What’s going on?” Liam asks as Louis pushes him onto the bed and tries to get his clothes off. 

“I want to do this, _it,_ now.”

 _“Now,_ now? I thought you wanted to wait?”

“Not anymore.”

Then Louis grabs both sides of Liam’s face and kisses him hard, knowing that’s the best way to get Liam to stop asking questions. 

“I love you, Liam Payne,” Louis mumbles against Liam’s lips, “Always have, always will.”

“I love you, too.”

They smile at each other as Louis leans back so Liam can get his shirt off and Louis can start to undress himself. They’re both topless and Liam’s pants are off when they hear a knock on the door, “Louis?” Louis hears his mother’s voice through the closed door, “Zayn’s here.”

Louis ignores it, but Liam sits up, “Zayn?”

Louis pulls him back down and continues to kiss his neck, “Zayn’s at school. Kiss me.”

Liam pulls away and start to get dressed as he replies, “No, I just heard your mum say he’s here. Don’t you want to go say hey?”

Reluctantly, Louis nods while saying, “Yeah, totally.”

They both finish getting redressed and Liam leaves while Louis tries to quickly fix up his hair from the mess it’s become. He walks out of his room just as he sees Liam start to make his way to Zayn. Stepping between the two, Zayn and Louis both pause when they make eye for the first time in over a year. 

After a moment’s pause, Louis smiles and goes in to give Zayn a hug, “Hiii, Zayn! It’s so good to see you! Come! We’re about to have dinner!”

Louis’s mum walks up to interrupt, “I’ll set a place at the table for you next to Louis!”

Zayn smiles, but declines by explaining, “I’d love to, but I have to go.”

Louis’s smile, although clearly fake, visibly decreases, “You’re leaving?”

“Yeah, I actually don’t feel very well. I just wanted to come by and say hello. I’ll see you at school tomorrow,” Zayn hurriedly says as he turn and leaves.

All traces of a smile leave Louis’s face as he walks over to where a few of his friends from school are. 

He mumbles to himself, “School? I guess he’s back for good.”

One of his friends – more like minions – must think Louis’s speaking to him, because he says, “Didn’t you know he was coming?”

Louis turns to the boy, “Yeah, of course. I just wanted it to be a surprise.”

Out of the corner of his eye, Louis can see Harry smirking into his glass of wine. 

 

The next day, Louis and his minions are sitting on the steps in Hyde Park – near their private school – discussing the Kiss on the Lips party. Louis was in charge of planning it and it was a big deal since he was only in his first year of Sixth Form. It was pretty much a school event, but at the same time, it wasn’t, since you had to have an invitation to come.

As they’re all sitting there, Greg, a fourteen year old male from Ireland walks up with the invitations. Louis allowed him to make them in exchange for his own invitation. It was a big deal for a fourteen year old to get an invite, but Greg shows great potential as a minion. Louis’s going to need a successor when he leaves for university, after all, so he’s been looking at the younger kids for new minions. 

Louis’s looking through the invitations as his other minions compliment Greg on his good work. 

Louis grabs one of the envelopes and looks to where Greg is standing in front of him, “Not bad work. Here’s yours,” Louis gives Greg a small smile as he hands over one of the invitations, “As promised.”

Greg smiles up at Louis, “Thanks.”

At that moment, they look over to see Zayn quickly approaching, “Hey! Here you guys all are. I looked all over the dining hall for you.” Zayn then looks over to see Greg standing next to him and introduces himself, “Hey, I’m Zayn.”

Greg smiles as he replies, “I know! I mean, I’m Greg.”

They both laugh and Louis can’t help but roll his eyes at the whole exchange. 

Zayn turns and picks up one of the envelopes sitting on the ground, “So, when’s the party?” His question is clearly directed to anyone, but everyone looks to Louis for an answer. 

There’s an awkward pause before Louis answers, “Saturday. And, you’re kind of not invited, since, until twelve hours ago, everyone thought you were at boarding school. Now we’re full. And um, Greg used up all the invites.”

Greg starts, “Um, actually-“

But Louis is quick to interrupt and turn to Greg, “You can go now.”

Greg and Louis exchange a fake smile that they’ll all pretend is real. Then, Greg turns and exchanges what might be a real (small) smile with Zayn. Finally, Greg turns to actually leaves. 

Louis looks at Zayn, “Sorry.”

Zayn shrugs it off with, “It’s okay. I’ve got a lot of stuff to do anyway.”

Louis stands up and his minions are quick to follow, “We better get going. Unless you want us to wait for you? It looks like you’ve got a lot of yogurt left?” Louis nods down to the yogurt in Zayn’s hand, almost completely forgotten. 

“No, it’s okay.”

They all walk past Zayn and are almost to the bottom of the step when Zayn shouts, “Louis!” Louis turns and Zayn continues, “Think we could meet tonight?”

Louis puts on his fake smile to reply, “I’d love to, but I’m doing something with Liam tonight.”

Zayn doesn’t seem to care as states, “The Palace? Eight o’clock? Liam will wait.”

Louis looks him up and down before replying, “I could probably do a half hour.”

“Thanks for making the time.”

“You’re my best friend.”

Then Louis turns to walk away and Zayn turns to walk further up the steps. 

 

Later that night, Louis and Zayn are sitting at the bar at the Palace Hotel. Louis had come in five minutes late to find Zayn already there. He had sat next to him and they said there basic “hello”s and “glad you could make it”s. They ordered their drinks, of course not being carded for being under 18. 

Then they sat in silence for a solid three minutes. 

Eventually, Zayn turns to Louis and asks, “So, how’s your mum doing with the divorce and everything?”

Louis shrugs, “Great. So, my dad left her for another man. She lost fifteen pounds; got an eye lift. It’s been good for her.” His tone makes it clear he’s being sarcastic.

“I’m really sorry.”

“Yeah, I could tell, since you didn’t call or write the entire time it was happening.” More sarcasm.

“Yeah, no, I know. I was just – boarding school.”

Louis raises his eyebrows, “I don’t even know why you went to boarding school to begin with. Do you know how it felt? Calling your house when you didn’t show up to school and having your mum say, ‘Zayn didn’t tell you that he moved to Scotland?’”

“I just – I had to go. I needed to get away from everything. Please, just trust me.”

“How can I trust you when I feel like I don’t even know you?”

“Let’s fix that. I saw you at school with Luke and Ashton, I get it. I don’t want to take any of that away from you –”

“Because it’s just yours to take if you want it?”

“No! That’s not what I mean! . . . I miss you. I just want things to go back to the way they used to be. You know? Walking to school together, dancing on tables at Bungalow, night swimming at your mum’s country house? You’re my brother, you know? We’re each other’s family, we need each other.”

Louis looks at Zayn and slowly lets himself relax. He kind of lets out a breath as he says, “Well, you missed some classic Joannah Tomlinson meltdowns. If it wasn’t such a ‘tragedy,’ it would have been funny. . . Actually, it kind of was.”

They both laugh and it feels like one of the first times Louis’s actually laughed in the past year. 

Zayn looks at Louis as he says, “I wish I could have been there.”

Louis shrugs, “Well, you are now.” They both smile at each other. Louis glances at his watch and then looks back up at Zayn, “I have to meet Liam. Kind of have something special planned.”

They both stand up to put their coats on, “Well, I don’t want to keep you. But –” Then Zayn pulls Louis in for a hug, “I love you, Lou.”

They release each other and Louis replies, “I love you, too, Z.”

 

Louis sets everything up in his room and then calls Liam. 

When Liam walks in twenty minutes later, he stops at the door to take everything in. All the lights are out, so the only light is coming from the candles lit throughout the room. There is soft instrumental music playing in the background and there’s a lovely smell in the air that Liam can’t quite place. The most noticeable thing in the room, though, is Louis. He’s sitting in a chair against the wall, in nothing but his underwear. His hair is styled to perfection and his skin is glowing. 

“Wow.”

Louis slowly stands up and walks toward Liam, “Hi.”

“Hi,” Liam quietly mutters as he looks down. 

Louis turns to look behind him and then turns back to Liam, “Is it too much? I want it to be special.” Louis leans in to kiss Liam, but Liam pulls away. Louis is confused as he asks Liam, “What’s wrong?”

Liam looks to the floor, then up at Louis as he starts, “Look, I don’t know how to say this, or if it’s even the right thing to do, but umm, there’s something I need to tell you.” They both sit down, and Liam continues, “Last year, at the Cowell wedding, Zayn and I were in the bar in the back. There was no one else there. I know it’s no excuse, but we had both had a lot to drink. We were goofing around and – we started kissing.” Liam stops and looks at the ground, letting out a huge breath. 

He then turns to Louis and Louis asks, “But that was it? You guys kissed?”

Liam looks at the ground and Louis lets out a rough breath as he looks at the ceiling and tries to stop himself from crying. Liam not answering is all the confirmation that Louis needs. 

Louis starts to stand to leave the room, but Liam is quick to stand and grab Louis’s wrist the stop him. Louis whips around and there are tears falling from his eyes and he shouts, “I knew it! I always knew there was something! Get out!”

Liam looks at Louis and covers his face with his hands as he walks out of the room, knowing that Louis wants to be alone. 

Louis stays in his room for the rest of the night, trying to gather his thoughts. He cries for most of the night, knowing that the boy he’s been dating since primary school isn’t a virgin anymore. They were going to lose their virginities to each other, when they were ready, and now that could never happen. And of course the person Liam lost his virginity to was Louis’s best friend. 

Louis truly is alone in the world.

 

The next morning, Louis is in bed when his maid, Mary, informs him that Liam has called to ask Louis to join him for dinner. Louis consider telling Mary to call Liam back to tell him to fuck off, but then he decides to go. After all, Louis has no one, so he’ll at least hear what Liam has to tell him. 

Later that night, Louis enters one of the nicest restaurants in London and lets the hostess lead him to where Liam is already sitting. They don’t speak as they look at the menu and the waitress takes their order. They continue not speaking as they wait for their food to arrive. 

It’s not until they get their salads that Liam says, “Thanks for meeting me.” Louis doesn’t make an effort to even look at Liam, so he continues, “Look, Louis, I really hurt you. I know that. I want to fix it.”

Louis looks up to counter, “Really? And how are you going to that?” He raises his eyebrows and takes a sip of his drink, clearly closed off. 

“I want to put everything in the past. I’m not going to see Zayn again, or even talk to him. It’ll be like he doesn’t exist.”

Louis considers his options for a minute, before he lets a breath out through his nose and replies, “I think that’s a good idea. Let’s not mention it again.” Then he smiles and reaches across the table to grab a piece of food from Liam’s plate, “You going to eat that?”

Liam looks confused as he asks, “That’s it? Cause you were pretty upset last night. Should we talk about this?”

Louis shrugs his shoulders, “There’s nothing to talk about. I overreacted. You say it’s in the past; it’s in the past. I’m sure you have no feelings for him anymore. I just feel bad for Zayn. He really missed you. What time is the limo coming again?”

“Eight.”

Louis looks at his watch, “Perfect.” Then, he continues eating. 

 

The next day, there is the Kiss on the Lips party. Harry’s limo picks him up at nine and when he sits down, Liam, Harry, and two of Louis’s minions are already seated. Louis takes his place by Liam and they make their way to the hotel where the party is. 

They all drink champagne, although it’s clear that Harry has had more than just a few glasses already. He’s kissing one of Louis’s female minions and has one of his hands on the leg of a male minion. 

Louis makes a disgusted face at Liam and they just laugh at each other and share a kiss; everything back to normal. 

Harry moves to sit in the seat beside Louis, so he can stretch out. Then, while Liam is talking to Luke, a minion, Harry moves to whisper in Louis’s ear, “Why are you guys so tense? Trouble in paradise?”

Louis looks at Harry, who’s leaning just a tad too close, “We’re not tense.”

Harry chucks and leans back in his seat, looking out the window as he takes another drink from his glass. 

 

Louis makes his rounds at the party, and as he’s walking around, he sees Harry lead Greg up a back stairwell. Geez, Louis didn’t even know Greg was gay. How many gay people went to this school?

He makes his way over to where his minions are and a few minutes later, one of them leans over to say, “Zayn’s here.”

Louis makes a displeased face and asks, “What’s he doing here? He wasn’t invited.”

Louis starts to walk away to find Zayn when Liam stops him, “Louis, are you really going to make him leave?”

Louis turns to him, “Did you invite him?”

“What? No, of course not.”

Liam goes to walk away, but Louis grabs his arm, “Do _not_ talk to him.”

“I was going for a walk. It’s getting kind of stuffy in here.”

They share a look, then Liam turns to walk out. He walks right by Zayn on his way out, not making eye contact. Zayn watches him walk past, then turns to look at Louis. 

Louis makes eye contact with Zayn and while on the outside he shows no emotion, on the inside, he feels like he’s about to start sobbing. By the time Louis turns away, it’s very clear to both of them that their friendship is not fixed, regardless of the conversation they had only a few nights prior.

While standing across the ballroom, Louis sees Zayn and some kid with a bad dye job walk up the stairs Louis saw Harry lead Greg up earlier. A few minutes later, he sees both of them, plus Greg, walk down the stairs. As they walk past Louis, Zayn and the boy with the bad hair connect their hands – gross. Zayn went from sleeping with Liam to holding hands with a badly dressed boy, with obviously dyed blond hair? Talk about a downgrade. 

Louis watches them leave and once they’ve entered their cab, he walks over to the door. He glances behind him to see Harry standing behind him. Without turning around, Louis says, “He better not show his face again.”

Then, he hears Harry reply, “I’m actually hoping he will.”

Louis turns to look up at Harry and sees what looks like a busted lip. Harry turns his head to look at Louis. Louis leans back against Harry for just a moment, before they turn and head back inside to the party.


	2. The Wild Brunch

_I bet you’re wonder what Gossip Girl is doing up so early? Truth is, I never went to bed. Why waste precious time dreaming, when waking life is so much better?_

_Is there really anything better than a lazy Sunday? Reading the paper in bed, sipping tea, scrambling an egg or two? Yeah, right. We Upper East Siders don’t do lazy. Breakfast is brunch and it comes with champagne, a dress code, and a hundred of our closest friends. And enemies._

_Harry’s dad, Des Styles, is hosting the annual brunch for his foundation. Everyone is invited. Well, not everyone._

 

“Zayn better just stay away.”

Louis was pacing back and forth in his living room. Luke and Ashton, two of his minions, were sitting on the couch, and Mary was making their tea for them. 

“Thank you, Mary,” Louis directs to his maid as she hands him his tea. Luke and Ashton also thank her. Louis continues talking to Luke and Ashton, “I don’t want to see Zayn as school and he better not show up at brunch today.”

“You’re really mad at Zayn,” Luke states.

“Yeah, I hope you never get that mad at us,” Ashton agrees

“Well, you would never do what Zayn did,” Louis explains, turning to look at them while he continues pacing, trying to pick out an outfit for brunch later. 

“No, never!” Ashton exclaims.

Luke shakes his head, “Of course not.”

“I wonder if Liam remembered brunch,” Louis questions as he turns his attention to his phone, “It would be so wrong to show up without my boyfriend, whom I love, and who loves me.” 

Louis calls Liam and is about to hang up when Liam answers with a muffled, _“Hello?”_

“Hi, sweetie, did I wake you?”

_“No, I’m up.”_

“Well, get some strong coffee and jump in the shower sleepyhead. Harry’s dad’s brunch is today at the Palace.”

_“Uhh, right. Of course.”_

They then hang up. 

“Luke? Ashton? I need to get ready.”

They both stand up and start to grab their things, knowing that’s their cue to leave. Once they’re both gone, Louis sits down and slowly finishes his tea 

He takes a shower, taking his time to make sure his body is cleaned to perfection. His body is one of the things he’s most proud about. He’s not naturally thin and lean, so he has to make sure to eat healthy and work out. Zayn’s never had problems with his body. 

When he gets out, he dries off, and puts some pants on and then goes to sit in front of his vanity. He styles his hair, also to perfection, and applies moisturizer to make sure his skin stays flawless. Zayn has always had perfect skin, so Louis has to make sure he never has any flaws in his own skin. 

As he’s putting his trousers on, his phone starts to ring. He looks over at it and sees Zayn’s name flashing. He hits Ignore. 

 

Thirty minutes later, Louis hears the elevator ring, letting him know that someone is here. He walks down the stairs, seeing Zayn walking off the elevator. 

Louis smiles, “Zayn?” Louis continues walking down the stairs and stops a few steps up when Zayn comes to stand in front of him.

Zayn smiles and lifts up the bags in his hand as he says, “Hey, I brought tea and Grease.”

Louis scoffs and walks past Zayn, dropping his smile as he says, “I must have totally blanked on the part when I invited you over.”

Zayn, confused, turns to follow Louis, “I called you. Louis, it’s Sunday morning. Tea, croissants, Grease, it’s our tradition.”

“I have new traditions now.” Louis grabs the paper off the coffee table and goes to sit in one of the couches in the foyer, deciding to relax a little before he goes to brunch. 

“Well, they’re not traditions if they’re new,” Zayn pouts as he turns to Louis, even though Louis is completely ignoring his presence. Seeing Louis make no effort to acknowledge him, Zayn takes a seat at the other end of the couch. They sit in silence for a minute, before Zayn urges, “Look, Louis, I’m really trying to make an effort here. I thought everything was good between us.”

Louis rolls his eyes and looks at Zayn, “It was. Before I found out you had sex with my boyfriend.”

Zayn opens his mouth to reply, but nothing comes out. He sits there for a moment trying to figure out what to say, but continues to be speechless.

Louis raises his eyebrows at Zayn, and leans back into his seat. He quite enjoys seeing Zayn at a loss for words. 

Zayn can’t make eye contact as he asks, “How’d you find out?”

Louis, almost a little smug, answers, “Liam told me. At least he felt he owed it to me to tell the truth.”

Zayn looks at Louis, “I don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t bother saying anything. I wouldn’t believe you anyway.” With that, Louis stands up and walks towards the stairs, done with the conversation. 

Zayn is quick to stand up and try to follow, “Louis, it was –”

Louis whips around to interrupt, “You know, I always knew you were a whore. I never took you for a liar, too.”

Zayn looks like he want to say something to retaliate, but instead he asks, “Louis, how can I fix this?”

Louis raises his eyebrows in disbelief and cocks his head, “You don’t, Zayn. You just stay away from me, my boyfriend, and my friends. You’re done here.” With that, Louis shrugs his shoulders at Zayn and turns to walk back up the stairs. 

He waits until he hears Zayn leave to let out the breath he was holding in. He sits down on his bed and puts his heads in his hands, willing himself not to cry. 

Not even twenty minutes later, he hears the elevator ring again. 

He sighs heavily and as he's walking down the stairs, he yells, “Mary! I thought I told you I didn’t want to see anyone!” Then, he mumbles to himself, “Honestly, why am I so popular today? Oh, right, I'm me.” He looks up when he gets to the bottom of the stairs to find Greg standing there, all smiles, “Hi, Greg.”

“Hi!”

“What do you want?” Louis gestures for Greg to follow him, but doesn’t show him where to sit. Louis takes a seat on the same couch he was sitting on not even an hour prior and lets Greg stand in front of him, looking all flustered.

“Uhh, I realized that I still have your calligraphy pens. . .from when I made those invitations? I thought you might need them for something.”

Louis takes the pens, but rolls his eyes at Greg, “That is the lamest excuse I’ve ever heard.” They’re silent for a moment, then Louis smirks, “You want to know what Harry Styles is saying about you.” 

“No.” Louis smiles and it only takes a minute before Greg gives in, “Is he? Saying things?”

Louis pretends to think for a moment before replying, “No. Harry likes to brag about his conquests, not his victims.”

Louis looks at Greg for a moment before standing up, “C’mon, you can help me get ready for brunch. I don’t think I care much for this suit.” 

Greg smiles and nods and he says, “Okay, sure!”

When they get upstairs, Louis strips out of the suit he’s currently wearing, and put on one of his suits from last year, already knowing he isn’t going to want to wear it today.

Greg drops his jaw at Louis, “Wow, Louis, you look amazing. Honestly, it’s gorgeous.”

Louis frowns at his reflection, “It’s . . . average. The color is last season, and besides, Armani has a much better version.”

Louis hears Greg mumble, “Right,” as he takes the suit off and puts on one he might actually decide to wear. Greg stands up from his seat as Louis is busy putting another suit on and he goes to look over all the clothing thrown onto Louis’s bed, “Wow, these styles are great – oh my god, you have a cabbage patch doll! My older brother used to have one of these, his name was Cedric.”

Louis laughs, not turning away from the mirror, “Your brother’s name is Cedric?”

“Oh, no, that was his cabbage patch kid. My brother’s name is Niall. Actually, you might know him. He, umm, he went out with Zayn last night.”

 _The kid with the bad hair dye job._ Louis stops what he’s doing and turns to Greg, “That’s your bother?” Louis realizes he’s shown too much interest and is quick to laugh, “So, does that mean you’re friends with Zayn now?”

“I mean, I don’t have a problem with him.” Louis raises his eyebrows expectantly, and lets Greg continue, “But, if someone did have a problem with him, I wouldn’t have a problem with that either.”

Louis smiles and lets himself sit down, “You know, if you like that suit, you can have it.”

Greg smiles, “What?! No, no.”

Louis continues to smile at Greg, “I’m sure you’ll find some way to replay me.”

Greg lets out a breath in disbelief and continues smiling at Louis, “Louis, thank you! For the suit and for the other thing, about Harry.”

Louis nods, “If you want to be a part of this world Greg, people will talk, eventually. You need to decide if all this . . . is worth it.” 

Greg nods and smiles at Louis. He leaves with the suit. 

 

When Louis arrives at brunch at the Palace, he finds most of his friends to already be there. Louis tends to be the last one to arrive at places – that way he’s never waiting on other people.

He takes the empty seat between Liam and Harry and immediately gets pulled into the conversation. 

They’re all having a good time, when thirty minutes later, Louis looks up to sees Zayn standing at the door, next to that gross, poor looking boy – Niall. Greg never looks that gross, so why does Niall? 

Louis looks up at the ceiling and mutters, “You’ve got to be kidding.”

Harry follows Louis’s line of vision and sits back in his seat when he sees who’s at the door, “This should be fun.”

 

Louis spends a good portion of the morning keeping an eye on Liam and avoiding Zayn, really not wanting to deal with another confrontation. He loses track of Liam when he gets pulled into a conversation with the Captain – Liam’s father. 

“Louis! You look amazing!”

Louis smiles up at the Captain, knowing it’s likely that this is his future father-in-law, “Thank you, it’s one of my mum’s designs.”

“Oh, I wasn’t just talking about the suit. Where is your lovely mother this morning?”

Louis forces a smile as he replies, “Paris. Must be some drama going on at her store there.”

“Hopefully not too dramatic, I’ve heard her line is doing very well. I was just telling my firm what a great investment she’d make. She’s really going places.”

“Hopefully places far, far away,” Louis laughs and upon seeing the Captain’s reactions, he adds on, “Just kidding.”

Thank god, Liam chooses that moment to walk up, “Hey, I’ll get you a refill,” He says as he grabs the empty glass from Louis’s hand, “I’ll be right back.” He kisses the side of Louis’s head and turns to walk away. 

His dad quickly adds, “I’ll go with you. Excuse me, Louis.” He nods back to Louis. Louis smiles at him, but is glad to have a moment to himself. 

He feels someone walking up behind him and turns to find Harry. He lets out a breath, letting all of his fake smile disappear, “I can’t believe Zayn came to this brunch. I told him to stay away.”

Harry nods and redirects the conversation, “Are you worried about Liam? Just a shot in the dark. I think you know what to do to get his attention.” Harry holds up a key.

“And what is that?” Louis asks, looking down at the key.

“A key to my suite, Liam’s heart, and your future happiness.” Louis looks at the key for a moment before deciding to take it. Harry leans in to quietly say, “I’m honored to be playing even a small roll in your deflowering.”

Louis turns away from him, “You’re disgusting.”

Harry nods, “Yes, I am. Just grab Liam and finish this. Report back with details.”

Louis rolls his eyes as he walks away, key in hand. 

Louis walks up to Liam as he finishes a conversation with his dad and some other adult. Louis grabs his arm and turns his around so they’re face to face. Then Louis puts his hands on either side of Liams head and asks, "What’re you doing right now?”

“Uhh, well, I was just getting –“

Louis leans in really close to interrupt, “Well, how about me?”

“Um…”

“What? Do you have a better offer?”

“No, of course not. Now?”

Louis nods and starts backing them toward the lobby where the elevator to Harry’s suite is, “Now.”

They rush to the elevator and kiss the entire way up, already starting to undo some of the bottoms on each of their shirts.

“Where’re we going?” Liam asks against Louis’s lips.

“I got us the best room in the entire place,” Louis answers as he opens the door to Harry’s suite.

Realization hits Liam as they entire the room, “Wait, this is Harry’s room.”

Before Louis can reply, he hears, “Liam?” come from a voice behind him. 

He’s quick to turn around and see, “Zayn?”

Zayn looks away from Liam and turns to Louis, “Louis.”

Louis starts walking towards Zayn, “What’re you doing here?”

“I was meeting Liam.”

Liam is quick to answer before Louis can even get his next question out, “Just to talk! I swear.”

“You said you’d never speak to him again!” Louis yells at Liam.

They turn back to Zayn when he asked, “Wait, you said that? Why would you say that?”

Even though Zayn was asking Liam, Louis is the one to answer, “Because you can’t be trusted!”

Liam still keeps talking to Louis, “It’s not Zayn’s fault.”

Louis turns back to him, “Do not defend him.”

“I asked him to come here.”

“Oh! Oh, so you do want to talk to him.”

“Yes! To explain why I’m not talking to him." 

Louis looks between the two of them, “Maybe I’ll just leave you two to finish that fascinating conversation.” And he starts backing up towards the door.

Zayn, who’s been mostly silent, interrupts, “No, no, I’ll go. I’ll let you guys get back to your quickie.”

Louis is quick to turn on him, “It wasn’t a quickie. Sex is actually kind of a big deal to some of us.”

“Ooh, yeah, I can see that. Harry’s bed, very romantic. Classy too.”

Louis nods and with a sarcastic tone, he says, “That’s rich coming from you.” Louis starts backing towards the door again as he continues, “I bet your new friend Niall would love to hear about how classy you really are.” 

Zayn’s confused as he asks, “Niall?”

They make eyes contact as Louis opens the door and realization of what’s about to happen hits Zayn just as Louis slams the door closed. 

Louis takes off for the back stairwell that he knows is a lot faster than the main staircase and he makes it down to the party long before he knows Zayn will. He scans the party for a head with bad roots, and spots Niall by the open bar – Irish, of course, like Greg.

Louis makes his way over, “Niall?” He looks up just as Louis is standing in front of him and he holds out his hand, “Hi, I’m Louis Tomlinson, Zayn’s friend.”

He nods, “Oh, do you happen to know where he is?”

Louis smirks, “As a matter of fact, I do.”

Of course, that’s when Zayn and Liam walk up, and Zayn interrupts, “Louis.” 

Niall looks up, “Oh, Zayn, there you are. Where were you?”

Louis answers, “He was waiting in a hotel room, for my boyfriend.”

“To talk,” Zayn directs to Louis.

“About why we weren’t talking,” Liam directs to Niall.

Louis rolls his eyes, “Yeah, and that doesn’t sound any smarter the second time.”

Niall looks confused as he asks, “Why weren’t you talking?” There’s an awkward silence for a moment. Then Niall turns to Liam, “Does this have anything to do with why you were waiting for Zayn this morning?”

Louis turns to Liam, “You were what?”

And of course Harry walks up to interject, “Here I thought you were waiting for me.”

And then Niall looks to the ground, “And that’s exactly what this situation needs – Harry. Now what is going on here?”

Louis turns to answer, “We were just getting to that.”

Zayn steps in, “Louis, please, don’t do this.”

Louis turns to look at him, “Sorry, did you want to tell him?”

Harry smirks, “I’ll tell him.” 

Louis and Liam turn to Harry and simultaneously ask, “You know.”

Harry turns to them, “I know everything.” 

Niall shrugs his shoulders, “And apparently, I know nothing.”

Zayn swallows and turns to Niall, "Look, Niall, it was a long time ago and I regret it.”

Harry interrupts and turns to Zayn, “Look, Zayn, stop trying to pretend you’re a new guy. So you slept with your best friend’s boyfriend. I kind of admire you for it.”

They’re all silent for a moment, waiting to see how Niall is going to process this new information. 

When Zayn won’t meet Niall’s eyes, Niall asks, “Is that true?”

Zayn won’t answer, so Louis does, “Yeah, and then he ran away, and lied about it.” They all look at Louis, but Louis only looks at Zayn. He turns to Niall, “I just thought you should know about it, before you fall head over heels for the perfect guy and his perfect world. And then you're left all alone with no one but your cabbage patch kid.”

They hear Liam mutter, “Cabbage patch?” and Harry laughing under his breath, but they ignore it.

Niall turns to Louis, “Did you talk to my brother?”

Harry lifts he head, “Ahh, yes, little Greg. I believe he and I have some unfinished business.”

Niall walks up to Harry and with a firm voice, “You stay away from him.”

Harry doesn’t lose eye contact or flinch as he says, “So little time, so many sluts to fuck.”

Harry barely gets his last word out before Niall pushes him so hard, he falls back into the table behind him. Harry is quick to steady himself, but the waiter behind him is not so lucky. Wine glasses go everywhere and glass is all over the floor. The crowd around them gasps and phones are being taken out to quickly take photos to send in to gossip girl. 

It's silent until Niall loses it, “It’s fine, it’s fine, and everyone can stop looking.” He then gestures to Harry, “He’s a jerk. It’s my fault and I’m leaving.”

Zayn turns to him, “I’ll go with you.”

Niall puts his hand up, “Actually, I’d prefer if you didn’t.”

Liam turns to Louis, “I hope you’re happy.”

Louis rolls his eyes, “Not even close,” and he walks out of the room, tired of all the drama. 

 

Later that night, Louis is lying in bed. Liam had come in and laid next him, but Louis turned his back to him. Louis doesn’t know how long they laid in silence before Liam says, “Look, Louis, you can either try to forgive me and move on, or we end it.” 

Liam puts his hand on Louis’s shoulder and Louis slowly moves his hand to cover Liam’s. 

 

_Well, Zayn’s mystery man is a mystery no longer. His name is – ugh, who cares? Now that he and Z are over, so are his fifteen minutes. But, his brother Greg was spotted with a new suit, gifted from Louis, himself. Everyone knows a Joannah original is the uniform of L’s private army. But will G be a loyal soldier? Or will he side with Z’s rebel forces? And as for Z himself? We hear that he left today’s brunch with no friends, no boy, and nowhere left to run.  
_

_It looks like the ultimate insider has become a total outsider. It’s your move, Zayn. And you know who will be watching: Gossip Girl._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave kudos if you like it and any constructive criticism. This is my first time writing in years. Right now, it's pretty much just like the show. I'm hoping it'll get more original as I write it, but for right now, I'm just trying to get back into the swing of writing. I'm making Sunday the day I update, so the next chapter will be up in a week. Hope you like it!
> 
> P.S. Sorry if my British terminology sucks, I'm American.


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